the penny has dropped

if you could do ANYTHING in the world for a living;
where money, experience, age, knowledge, time, skill, etc, etc, etc,
is no obstacle, what would you want to do?

despite being overwhelmed by the kind comments on my dear fear post (thank you);
suddenly, after telling fear to fuck off,
i came to an eerie standstill.

it was as if now i didn't have fear standing in the way,
i didn't know which way to go ~
or even where i wanted to go!

even when i started writing this post, it was filled with all sorts of reasons about why i had these feelings of inadequacy and insecurities... until i realised these are merely the origins for some of the less favourable stories i may tell myself; but they still don't answer the pertinent question:
without these layers of inhibition, who am i?

i feel like a reluctant life model about to drop her robe for the first time,
and i am really struggling with this.

but i know if i could do anything,
where failure, ego and fear don't exist,
i would spend my days creating ~
designing with words, imagery and a sprinkling of magic.

and i know if i felt no fear,
i wouldn't worry about how old i am,
or the fact i could be rejected,
and i would fill in that application and get on the foundation course.
yes, if i told fear to fuck off,
that's what i would do.