i've just started an online course with ali edwards and today was day 1.
yes, i am an online-course junkie, and proud of it too :)
anyhow, i digress...
task 1 was to make a list of possible stories you wanted to tell and,
as soon as ali said that, i felt my body seizing up.
all the usual gremlins began to rear their ugly little heads and i thought i was going to stumble at the first hurdle: what stories do i possibly have to tell?
but i followed her instructions nonetheless,
paused the presentation,
put on some music and sat pen in hand,
ready for 15 minutes of nothingness...
instead, what happened next surprised me.
i started writing.
it was as if the stories inside saw their one and only opportunity,
and leapt onto the page.
stories which i have purposely surpressed said,
"no ~ i want to be told,
because i define who you are today.
i am part of why you feel the way you do about this.
i deserve to be acknowledged,
heard, and understood."
although not all the ideas i had required intense soul diving,
a few made me a little uncomfortable, because to document something makes it real.
and it made me realise i have equal hesitation in owning moments that make me proud of myself, as i do with moments which have caused me deep pain.
but maybe this is part of the process.
part of the journey ~
with all that i am exploring, online and offline,
in a e-course or in my art journal.
it is ultimately about owning my story: past and present
honouring them, because they are a part of me~
because they make me who i am.
the fact they came up so unexpectedly tells me they want to be told ~
need to be told. be documented. be acknowledged.
and through owning these stories,
i will be celebrating myself.
what stories about yourself would you tell?
13 comments:
hello, my name is lisa and I am an ecourse addict!
I love this question and find myself squirming just thinking about it ... I found many of the Sark prompts brought up similar feelings and it was so liberating to put them down, let them be heard or witnessed as then I could let them go. Owning those parts, but not controlled by them.
I think the main theme/story I would want people, specifically my daughter, to know about me is I never gave up Hope and I never gave up on myself even when it seemed like the easiest course of action. I went through a dark night of the soul and i stayed the course and in the end, the darkness made the light that much more magnificent. That light is my daughter.
Shine on! It will be interesting to see how you fare doing 2 courses as soon Unravelling 2 starts and i will be there and in goddess camp. EGADS! I feel like I am gorging on all this wonderful stuff.
This made me well up :).
Thank you.
Ali
A fellow Yesterday & Day goer... thanks for sharing! Looking forward to when I can do this (no videos at work, even on lunch :().
hey sweetie... i absolutely LOVE this photo. it is flaming, and wild, and powerful, and passionate and brave.
big love you!
Telling our stories, and hearing each other's stories. I truly believe this can change the world. It can certainly change us. All power to your *pen*
Own it baby! We want to hear YOUR story xx
Love you beautiful! xx
i love this photo. it's as if the fire is underwater - passion and temperance. very beautiful as are your words.
You are a natural writer. I loved your post, and I'm looking forward to getting to know you better through Yesterday and Today.
MelissaL
"through owning these stories, I will be celebrating myself!"
Can I come? I'll bring the music :)
Hey swung over from the classes blog roll:) So loving your pic:) burn those creative insecurities up:) Yeah! Very awesome post:) so loving your blog!!!! And I too think I am having obsessive issues with online courses:) cynthia
LOVELY!!! What a great post! I celebrate you telling your stories!
Hugs!
WOW, sounds like a lesson that I need to learn!
This exercise is so illuminating for me. I hope that you're finding success in getting your stories written. I'm a classmate from Yesterda + Today.
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